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Glite Dictionary
as useful as a screen door on a submarine

as useful as a screen door on a submarine

9.9
Having no real use
  • idiom
  • Informal
translation icon : tan útil como una puerta de malla en un submarino
  • Most of the advice he gave me turned out to be as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

Examples

  • This old computer is as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • Trying to fix that broken vase with tape was as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • Bringing a flashlight to the picnic at noon was as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • I found the instructions to be as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • The old manual for that car is as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • I tried to use my phone for directions in the middle of the city, but without service, it was as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

  • Her suggestions for the project were as useful as a screen door on a submarine, leaving us frustrated.

Synonyms

useless
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
550 1.0

Not able to do the job it is made for

is a vivid idiom expressing total lack of practical value
as useless as tits on a boar hog
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
  • Offensive
1 9.9

Something that has no real purpose or value

expresses the same idea but with a nautical humorous image
as useful as a chocolate teapot
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
  • UK
9.9

Completely useless in real situations

uses a more extreme, absurd image to stress total uselessness
as useful as a hole in the head
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
  • Informal
9.8

Not helpful and not wanted in any situation

chooses a more exotic and humorous image to stress lack of value
as useful as a bag of dicks
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
  • Offensive
9.9

Completely without help for any task

is similarly strong but uses a comic, nonvulgar simile instead
unfunctional
vsas useful as a screen door on a submarine
8.2

Not useful for everyday tasks

is more colorful and idiomatic rather than a formal description

Antonyms

valuable
526 2.5

Very useful and important, for example advice or skills

functional
81 3.2

Working correctly so it can be used

How Useful

valuable
526 2.5
useful
947 1.0
helpful
689 1.0
unhelpful
17 3.0
ineffective
90 3.4
useless
550 1.0
as useful as a screen door on a submarine
  • Informal
9.9

Surface Forms

as useful as a screen door on a submarine positive

Morphology

as + useful + as + a + screen + door + on + a + submarine

The simile follows a transparent comparative pattern ('as X as Y') and the literal meanings of 'screen door' and 'submarine' let a learner infer that a screen door would be pointless on a submerged vessel, so the overall meaning 'completely useless' is inferable. However, understanding depends on real-world/pragmatic knowledge about screen doors and submarines (and some cultural familiarity), so the relation is not purely compositional or universally predictable.

Etymology

As useful as a screen door on a submarine is a saying that gives a clear picture: a screen door keeps bugs out but would let water in, and a submarine must keep water out, so a screen door there would be useless. That's why the phrase means 'completely useless'.